This Was Never Meant To Be
by YouDon'tKnowMe1306
Summary: When you want to let go of something you never have.


This Was Never Meant To Be

I don't know how many times I've lied to myself, but one thing's for sure. I've been lying to my fragile, and senseless self for so long it's enough- no it's already at the breaking point of no return. I wanted to end my life.

Tonight is the night I will see him again, and it pains me to not be the one by his side when he comes in through those double doors to introduce himself to all the mafia allies his family has been acquainted with ever since the Vongola was founded. I know I had all the chances in the world to tell him of my feelings when we were young, but like all other people in the world- I'm a coward.

Oh, forgive me, I seem to have forgotten to introduce myself. My name is Loretta Tachibana of the Goldea (gol-de-ya) Family, and I'm the heiress. I am 25 years old, my height is 5"1, and I'm half Italian and half Japanese.

My mother is Italian, she fell in love with my father the moment she met him two years before I was born when she visited Japan for her two weeks get-away vacation. Father was a very eccentric man, he loves to be the clown in any group he joins. However, he can also be very mature for his age because of how he's lived alone since he was 14 years old after his parents died in a plane crash coming back from Hawaii for their honeymoon. So father lived with his granny, but she doesn't need his company and decided to pay for his living expenses in Tokyo and helping him earn money by hiring him for his intelligence. As for my mother she was spoiled and very orthodox in her own way, mother loved to be the center of attention as she always dress up in the most stylish way and had her clothes custom made. Mother doesn't like the thought of someone having the same clothes as hers so she designed her own and have it tailored by an expensive tailor. My mother was a very loving woman once you get to know her, but she's strict and rough around the edges the first time you meet her it just takes quite a while for her to open up to others.

As for me, I'm nothing like my parents. I hate to be in the crowd and I don't like attention, I'd shy away from people who wants to talk to me and those who I don't want in my life. I do like expensive clothes, though, but not like how mother is. It's too much of a hassle to spend a lot of money on clothes that's custom made. If I like something I'd get it, no need to be spoiled about it.

I've been in this one-sided love ever since I met him. Sawada Tsunayoshi, the boy then was an outstanding somebody who emits something of a pure soul. I hated it at first because I couldn't stand that such person existed; someone who doesn't fight back no matter how pained he is. But I guess it's because I've only seen the bad in someone instead of the good ever since I was born.

However, he was so different, so, so different. He forgive so easily it makes my blood boil, he smiles at nothing even though it's a big deal. But that's how my heart chose him, and it hurts to be on the sideline while watching him hold her arm around his, walking up to me oblivious to the malicious thoughts running in my head on how I could steal him away from her.

Still, I can't the man I've been in love with looks so happy with her. I doubt that smile will ever be mine, and that future, that I wished so much that I would trade life with her if I can, will never happen. All I can do is watch from afar on how much distance is growing between us, and I'll ever be is friend.

It's okay as long as he's happy I can still be that supporting character whom he will need when the going gets rough. I'll be fine, and everything will be if my heart doesn't shatter into million pieces as it's already been cracked from the pain I've felt for ten years. Every feelings I've hidden from will be safe inside me as long as it doesn't come out and ruin his happiness.

Mother raised me to be an independent woman for she's afraid that something likes might happen. Father taught me to be the kind of person who values someone's happiness so nobody ruins mine. And so shall I be the daughter they expect me to be, and be proud of myself as they want me to be.

Goodbye, to you and I know from the start that this was never meant to be.


End file.
